Listen Up!

February 12, 2012

Listening – A Critical Skill to Advance in Your Career

In the last conversation you had with a business colleague – do you remember more of what you said or of what he/she said? Have you ever found yourself not listening to a family member but waiting for your turn to talk?

The number one complaint that people have of others in either business or personal relationships is “He/she does not listen to me.” Listening is the most important communication skill you can develop to improve how you manage others, sell to prospects, service your customers or interview for jobs.

Which of the following has happened to you because you didn’t listen well?

• The other person got very annoyed.
• The other person stopped talking.
• You tried to sell the wrong product to a prospect.
• You provided the wrong solution to an upset  customer.
• You lost a good customer or a great sales opportunity.
• Your employee complained about you to HR.
• The interviewer said “Thank you very much, we have a few more candidates to interview but we will be in touch.”
• Your customer repeated an objection.

Good listeners know that these things happened because they didn’t listen well. However,  many times people blame the other person or the situation instead of taking responsibility for their own listening.

So, how do you improve your listening skills? Here are three suggestions that are easy to follow:

Always let the other person know you are listening.

• Use body language that is generally perceived as active listening – i.e. – smiling, nodding your head, making eye contact, leaning forward slightly.
• Use verbal reinforcement – i.e. – saying things like ‘okay’, ‘uh-huh’, ‘interesting’
• If you are taking notes, stay connected with the other person.

Tell yourself you are going to listen and clear your mind of other distractions.

• If something pops into your mind while the other person is talking, jot it down quickly, tell yourself you will remember to get back to it and then refocus on the other person.
• If there are distractions you know about before the conversation, create an action plan of how you will approach the situation AFTER the conversation and then let it go.
• If your work environment distracts you, make positive changes. Sometimes just moving your computer four inches in one direction can help you focus on your conversations with your customers.

Listen with Your Ears and Your Eyes

Effective listeners pay attention to both the words the other person is using and how the other person expresses the words. Pay attention to tone, volume, body movements ,facial expressions and filler words when you are listening. Here are some examples.

• Frowning with Voice Dropping – Yes, that is fine.
• Smiling with Head Nodding – YES, that is fine!
• Filler Word – Um, yes, that is fine.
• Moving Forward in Chair – Yes, that is FINE!
• Moving Backwards – Yes…pause…that is fine? (voice rises at the end of the statement)

Each one of these statements includes the same words, but the meaning in all of them is very different. Listen with your eyes and ears to be the best listener you can be.

 

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